


The Last Will and Testament of Thomas Norstein

by KomaedaYuujin



Category: Digimon - All Media Types, Digimon Adventure tri., Digimon Savers | Digimon Data Squad, Digimon Tamers, Digimon Universe: Appli Monsters, Digimon Xros Wars | Digimon Fusion
Genre: he died for our sins, idk why toei would be like this...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-01
Updated: 2017-11-01
Packaged: 2019-01-27 21:02:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12590464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KomaedaYuujin/pseuds/KomaedaYuujin
Summary: Based on the script by 'The Frantics'





	The Last Will and Testament of Thomas Norstein

**Author's Note:**

> Based and Inspired by The Frantics' Boot to the Head

**Mikey:** As the executor of Mr. Norstein's estate, I have been empowered to read Mr. Norstein's Last Will and Testament.

 **Daigo:** Well, get on with it, the bars open soon.

 **Mimi:** Oh, poor, dear Thomas! Waaaa!

 **Joe:** Oh, there, there, Mimi.

 **Rei:** God, how predictably boring.

 **Rika:** I never worked for a kinder man.

 **Mikey:** If we are all seated, I shall proceed with the reading.

 **Rei:** I knew it.

 **Daigo:** Heh heh heh heh.

 **Mikey:** "I, Thomas H. Norstein, being of sound mind and body..."

 **Daigo:** That's a laugh!

 **Mikey:** "...do hereby divide up my considerable estate as follows. To my overly emotional, Mimi..."

 **Mimi:** Waaaa!

 **Joe:** Mimi, darling, he's talking about us.

 **Mimi:** Oh.

 **Mikey:** "...who grubbed with her husband, Joe, grubbed for everything they could get from me, and then cried crocodile tears when I needed sympathy..."

 **Mimi** **:** What?

 **Mikey:** "...To Mimi, I leave a boot to the head."

 **Mimi:** A what?

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Mimi:** Ow!

 **Joe:** Mimi, are you okay?

 **Mikey:** "...and another boot to her wimpy husband, Joe."

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Joe:** Ow!

 **Daigo:** Hahahahaha...

 **Mimi:** This is an outrage!

 **Mikey:** "...ah, but still, you are my friend, you have both admired my Rolls Royce, and since I no longer need it..."

 **Mimi:** Oh, dear Thomas, he's too kind!

 **Joe:** Yes.

 **Mikey:** "...I bequeath another boot to the head."

 **Mimi:** What?

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Mimi:** Ow!

 **Daigo:** Hahahaha...

 **Mikey:** "And one more for the wimp."

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Joe:** Ow!

 **Mikey:** "Next, to my alcoholic teacher..."

 **Daigo:** Hey, I don't want no boot to the head!

 **Mikey:** "...to dear Daigo, who has never worked a day in his drunken life..."

 **Daigo:** I'm coverin' up my head!

 **Mikey:** "...I leave my wine cellar and three crates of my finest whiskey."

 **Daigo:** Really?

 **Mikey:** "And a boot to the head."

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Daigo:** OH!

 **Mikey:** "And another for Mimi and the wimp."

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Mimi:** Oh!

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Joe:** Ow!

 **Mikey:** "Next, to my know-it-all upperclassmen, Rei..."

 **Rei:** This is so predictable...

 **Mikey:** "...I leave a boot to the head."

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Rei:** Uh! I knew it.

 **Mikey:** "And one for Mimi and the wimp."

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Mimi:** Ah!

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Joe:** OH!

 **Mikey:** "This takes care of family obligations. And now, to Rika..."

 **Rika:** Oh, uh, I don't want nothin'.

 **Mikey:** "...who took care of me faithfully these many, many years, who cared, made me laugh, brought me tea..."

 **Rika:** Oh, I didn't mind.

 **Mikey:** "To Rika, I bequeath a boot to the head."

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Rika:** OH!

 **Mikey:** "And one for Mimi and the wimp."

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Mimi:** AH!

 

_*BONK!*_

 

 **Joe:** OH!

 **Mikey:** "And so, to my dog Gaomon, I leave my entire vast...boot to the head!"

 

_*BONK!*_

 

_*GROWLS!*_

 

 **Mikey:** "And finally, to my lawyer, who has helped me on this will, I leave not a boot to the head...but a rabid Tasmanian devil, to be placed in his trousers?!" Ooohhh!! Oh, huh huh huh huh, and, and, "...and I leave my entire estate of $10 million to the people of Calgary so they can afford to move somewhere decent!" Huh.

 **Joe:** Is that it?

 **Rei:** That's it?

 **Daigo:** That's disgraceful.

 **Mikey:** There's one last thing for everyone.

 **Daigo:** Cover your heads, everybody!

 **Mikey:** "I leave everyone a lifetime supply of Guilmon Bread."

 **Joe:** Guilmon Bread?

 **Daigo:** Guilmon Bread?

 **Rei:** Guilmon Bread, that's all?

 **Mikey:** That's all.

 **Rika:** Well, what flavor is it?

 **Mikey:** Boot to the head!

 

_*BONK!* *BONK!* *BONK!* *BONK!* *BONK!*_

 

 **All:** OW!

**Author's Note:**

> well This is a non canon part crossover and idk if I will post the another version of this script...


End file.
